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real life high school advice:

  • dont slack 
  • be friends with everyone 
  • kiss ass like there is no tomorrow

Stay on the right fucking side of the hallway


join a bunch of clubs and show up as much as you can

pretend you have connections with security and teachers so you never get in trouble

steal a key to the elevator and if people ask you have a heart condition

become friends with the cooking teachers solely for free food

do crazy things in lunch that are embarassing or normal but no one else will do

always sit near the vending machine  you make a lot of friends and if a guy you can meet cute girls when you tackle the machine when their food gets stuck

(also people occasionally forget food in the bottom or something stuck becomes easy to knock out)

walk really slow in the halls because if people hate you for it in high school they’ll like you more in college

steal a graphing calculator from math (you’re going to need it in college)

when you go to the nurse make sure you looked up symptoms so the nurse will immediatly call someone to take you home (stomache ache and headache work usually)

befriend the art teacher they usually have the ability to get you out of class to help hang pictures or some other B.S.

befriend computer teachers so you can sneak on the computers

if you find any keys on the ground that dont look like they are for a car hold onto them you might be lucky and its a security key which means access to private rooms

always remember to kill bill and that john tucker must die

make the principal think you are a good kid and his best buddy

stay after even if there is no reason to

attend sporting events and plays to get street cred

learn to hop a fence for +5 to your friendship skill

be yourself and punch any bitch that says otherwise

make sure no one including security cams see you punch a bitch


Guess who goes back to school tomorrow?

Not me.


Bitch I got back to school september second and I’m excited as fuck because do you know what you do with your life when you dont go to school? A bunch of stupid crap that ruins your life….. or you just lay around all day doing nothing…. I am going to be a full time college student and I’ll only be going to school 2 days a week which means I get 4 days of free time for friends and crap and only go 2 days a week to get a degree and a job that will pay me a hell of a lot more money then a regular job so I can have a shitload more money to spend doing fun stuff :3

Dear Hot Guy,
    Stop being so sexy or I’m going to rip your clothes off
                                     Everyone who can see you

P.S. Blind people can see too you know



one time my sisters and i were driving around and we saw a mcdonald’s and the m was kind of loose because there was a bunch of wind

and my older sister was like “mel i dare you do go steal that m”

so of course i don’t back down from a dare and i pried the m loose from the sign and we stole that mcdonald’s m and we hung it outside of our house because our last name starts with m and it was clever okay

but the manager of that mcdonalds FOLLOWED US HOME TO OUR HOUSE and they came to our door a few hours later and my mom answered and the manager was like “…it’s peculiar that you have a mcdonald’s m outside of your house when ours got stolen”

and my mom was like “yeah what an odd coincidence”

and the manager came by like the next day and my mom answered again and the manager was like “alright we know what your fucking brat kids did” and my mom was like “my children would nEVER”

and she closed the door on her and she was like “marielle you little shit”
but then we took the m off of our house to throw off the manager and it’s in our garage now

but yeah i stole a big golden arch from mcdonald’s once



My cat, Freddie often tends to go missing for a few days, but always comes back perfectly fine. This time, though, he came back limping, starving, and dehydrated.

He refuses to eat, even though he shows signs of clearly wanting the food we offer him (normal dry food, wet food, tuna, baby food, meat), and at first, he wouldn’t drink water either. We’ve been feeding him baby food with an eyedropper, but he dislikes that quite a bit, and it’s definitely not feeding him enough.

And now it seems to have gotten worse. He’s coughing every few minutes, and there seemed to be a bloody-looking mucus coming from his mouth earlier.

He needs to get to the vet, ASAP, but we don’t currently have the money to pay for a visit and treatment.

(pictures are most recent, to oldest)

Donate here, or PLEASE, PLEASE pass this around wherever and however you can.

I’d really like this to reach today, if it can. He needs to get to the vet as soon as possible.

Same thing happened to my cat first time I stimulated it by vigerously rubbing it’s fur to loosen the skin to make moving easier for the cat, I then fed it water in small amounts, didnt try food but eventually between stimulation and water the cat was able to move on it’s own, drink, and eat by the next day……… but then it came back the same way a second time much worse and I was getting too nauseous from the smell of her to properly help, she died the next day…….. I cant afford a vet either sometimes you just know there is a way to save your cat other times you know it’s their time….either way I wish you the best

(Source: missprongs)

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